Friday, April 29, 2005

The Starting of a Brand New Day

it is not often that i am left speechless. i will say that it is an extremely rare occassion. there are only one person on this already over-populated world who has managed to do it in 28 years. it is also not often that a person has the ability to leave me completely dumbfounded. and dumbfounded in a good way is even more rare. which is why i have marked the date and time that it happened. and that would be thursday, april 28th, 2005 at 7:36 pm.

that is exactly when he stepped off the elevator to meet me at my apartment for our second date. i had a pretty clear mental picture of what he looked like and how he acted from our first date the week before. all of those good thoughts were reconfirmed within seconds of laying eyes on him again and without either of us having to say a word.

what puzzeled me was how nerveous i began to get minutes leading up to me seeing him again. i thought to myself that i was being crazy. we had been out before and had a great time. we've had conversations over the phone which lasted for over 2 hours. what the hell am i getting nerveous for? there's gotta be something going on between the two of us. i've given him outs, all of which he bypassed. i found myself starring at my reflection in the bathroom mirror ten minutes before he showed up, talking to myself out loud trying to calm myself down. wtf?!?!? when was the last time anyone had this effect on me? it was like one of those scenes out of a movie where the main character talks to himself trying to justify to the viewing audience what they did 10 minutes ago in the storyline.

as the night wore on, my comfort level shot off the scale. with some hesitation, the indestructable brick wall that lies before became unsteady. being fully aware of this, my emotions scrambled to hold the structure up with great force. in listening to him talk and listening to my responses to his questions and comments, a radical thought entered my mind and shot across every crevis of my brain.

have the dating gods finally come around and cut me a break? what's the catch here? what is it that he wants from me? what does he see in me? is this and he really too good to be true? it's funny, all of my usual bullsh*t and concerns have suddenly been silenced. all of the usual restlessness, worrying and fear calmed itself down and receeded.

they say you often meet someone when looking is the last thing on your mind. i'd like to meet 'they' and know how they came upon this hypothesis. up until recently, i have been making my way through, disposing of guys like paper towels. i was content with that and was well aware of my behavior. but, at the same time, i was left with the same feeling. i can tell you that it was definately not the same feeling i had this morning when i woke up and saw him on the other side of the bed. and get your minds out of the gutter. it was a very clean, respectful evening.

has samantha taken a back seat and allowed miranda, carrie and possibly even charlotte, to grab hold of the spotlight for a while? guess i won't know til i wake up each and every morning.


Blogger Farrah said...

The tables HAVE turned! I'm getting laid by 21 yo french dudes and you're cuddling! My world has been turned upside-down.

7:35 PM  

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