Friday, June 16, 2006

Dear George W.

my name is not4nothin. i wrote to you a while back. i tend to think that you did not receive my last letter because you have certainly dumbed yourself up to a whole new level in the span of time since my last letter. but, i digress. i usually stay out of politics or keep my feelings about this to myself. however, you have recently tried to pass an amendment which would screw with my rights as a american. but more importantly, you are screwing with my rights as a human being. so i can no longer stay quiet.

does any of this sound familair? i am referring to the amendment in which you tried to pass to completely banish same sex marriage in the united states. i'll put this in more simple terms for you to understand. you and your amendment are trying to take away my rights as a human being, deny me the privilage of ever getting married and are saying that because of something i did not choose i am not equal to anyone else walking down the street. did i get all of that correct? please, correct me if i am wrong.

you feel that the sacrament of marriage should only be shared between one woman and one man. so, britney spears' 55-hour marriage to child friend jason alexander is viewed as being more sacred than if i wanted to ever marry my partner of more than one year. a marriage based on liquor, spur of the moment thinking and two 20-year-olds getting caught up in the moment of being in vegas is more important and sets a better example than any gay couple who have fallen in love and ask to be treated equally. interesting. do you plan on continuing your fight against gay adoption as well? denying 2 people, who happen to be the same sex, the chance to take in a deserving child who needs love, shelter, guidance and stability. i guess people such as ms. jolie make a much better statement for this issue after adopting 2 foreign children (when there are struggling children in this country)and then wrecking a home to reproduce one of her own.

i must ask, george, do you seriously have nothing better else to worry about? perhaps you should focus on that war over in the middle east that you started over 3 years ago. remember all the men and women you've sent over there and who you refuse to bring home until we've accomplished what we set out to do over there? or possibly the issue of people lighting the american flag on fire and raising it up a flag pole. saw that one on the news this evening. and lets not forget that city down south which was all but destroyed almost a year ago due to hurricane katrina. you know, that southern city which created a huge revenue for this country. and please don't make me resort to the fact that there are still plenty of people in this country who are homeless, unemployed, don't have insurance or are dying from aids. no, instead you'd like to focus all of your attention on taking away the human rights of a group of people and almost banish them from existence. that's a little hitler-esque, wouldn't you say?

ok. lets, for a few seconds, imagine the world without gay people, past or present. i am going to ask a few questions and throw out some situations if there were no gay people. hopefully, the little hamster inside the wheel within your head hasn't fallen asleep and you'll stay with me. ok. the world without gay people.

first of all, broadway would have to go dark. or maybe women could take over the roles of the men. you know, sort of a reverse from how they did it during shakespearean times. oh, but no gay people. there wouldn't be any shakespearean plays to act out. the population of san francisco would drop by at least 60%. who would dress more than half of hollywood? do the make up? hair? madonna would not be the queen of pop. babs, celine and bette wouldn't have careers. neither would cher. i mean come on, all of those farewell tours would never have happened. who would be left for liza to marry? who would the producers of the 'x-men' movies have gotten to play wolverine? or magneto? half of the gyms across the country would not exist. where would straight women have to go when they want to go out dancing, not worry about how they look and more importantly, not worry about being touched in inappropriate places? who would conduct the masses in catholic churches on sundays? alcohol sales would plummet. who do you think contributes to that fund? i mean the gays can drink. and i am not talking about slinging back a bunch of $3 dollar drafts of bud lite. who do you think is buying the cases of grey goose? who would be the ones to start trends? write some of the greatest works of literature? plan your whitehouse parties? what would the entire species of white siberian tigers try to aspire up to? who would women have as best friends? are you still with me?

now i will be the first to admit, we have a few bad apples within the bunch. any group does. rosie o'donnell being one of them. i don't really like the fact that she represents us, but i deal with it. i also really don't like the fact that you represent all americans. but again, i deal with it. and alan cummings. he needs to put some clothes back on. really don't need to see that. but you have some bad representation as well. i mean seriously, you don't exactly do much for the straight, american, white male. i'd almost say that k-fed runs a pretty close second.

i will say this. you'd be even more of an idiot than you already are if you for one moment underestimate the gays. we are everywhere. in every state. on every street. sitting on the train. eating a few tables over from you at your favorite restaurant. and we do have power, along with disposable income. now you could laugh at my statement saying we have power. let's examine this though. i don't know if you watch 'american idol' or not. remember mandisaa from this past season? she was by no means a looker but the girl could sing. so they gays, an underdog themselves, made sure the girl got a chance and made it to the next round week after week. mandissa made the fatal mistake of publically saying she would never sing in a venue she knew was gay. bitch was voted off 2 days later. and clay. we all knew he'd go further coming in second. am i making myself clear george?

now i try to be a good person. i give people directions when they ask. i wait my turn when in line. i don't cheat on my taxes. and i don't march up to capital hill trying to pass a law banning all major-hateful-stupid-discriminatory-biggots such as yourself. so why go after me and my rights? what do you say we make a deal? you ignore me and not worry about my rights and i will ignore the fact that you are still in office. sound good?

and here's another bone i'll throw at ya. if and when i do decide to marry the love of my life, who also happens to be a man and who i have waited a very long time to find, we'll invite you to share in our special day. we'll actually make it easier for you and come to the white house lawn. that should be enough space to accomodate every gay and gay supporting person i plan to invite. and after my partner and i say 'i do' we'll all turn in your direction and salute you with our middle finger. that'll be our little wedding gift to you.

thanks for your time.


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